The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud.

Cover of Charlie St. Cloud: A Novel

The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud, by Ben Sherwood, is one of the books I read this summer.

The book description says: "... tells the haunting story of a young man who narrowly survives a terrible car wreck that kills his little brother. Years later, the brothers' bond remains so strong that it transcends the normal boundaries separating life and death... By day he (Charlie) tends the lawns and monuments of the ancient cemetery where his younger brother, Sam, is buried. Graced with an extraordinary gift after surviving the accident, he can still see, talk, and even play catch with Sam's spirit...

"... Luminous, soulful, and filled with unforgettable characters, The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud is one of those rare, wise books that reveal the mysteries of the unseen world around us, gently transforming the worst pain of loss into hope, healing, and even laughter. Suspenseful and deeply moving, its startling climax reminds un that sometimes tragedies can bring about miracles if we simply open our hearts."

As many of you might remember, I have had the honor of working with bereaved parents for a little more than 11 years through volunteering at The MISS Foundation.

"Death and Life", that is how parental bereavement feels like. We die when our child dies and we, then, learn to live a new life that is robbed of present and future, a new life that is filled with pain and sorrow, a new life that has many, many lessons and gifts to offer, as we open our hearts and souls and minds to listen, to find healing and peace and happiness again.

I've heard how many are afraid of forgetting their precious children. How people tell them that they should "let go", so their babies are able to "rest in peace". How they wished they could see, talk, hug and kiss their beautiful children one more time.

I have leaned from my own personal experience and from the wisdom shared by many that walk their own grief journey along with me, that parenting a dead child is possible.

We are able to transcend the physical realm to parent our dead child. How?

It is not easy, as we live and communicate through our bodies. The first urge a new mom has is to hug and cuddle her precious newborn. We, as bereaved parents, are not able to do so; but we can still hug them and kiss them in our hearts.

How I wish I had the power to give each and every bereaved parent a gift like Charlie's? How I wish they could find the way to talk and play and hug and kiss their precious little ones? Sadly, I can't.

The only power I have is the one my choices give me:

I chose to be present and willingly walk the grief journey of those that allow me to walk with them.

To lend a hand.

To know those precious children through the loving eyes of their courageous parents.

To do my best in the time I have on earth, to be worthy of finally hug and kiss and love my children to eternity.

The MISS Foundation announces...

ANNOUNCING!

Calling all MISS parents, grandparents, siblings, and friends! Two new MISS Fundraisers are about to be launched, and we invite you to participate and please send this email to others and post it so that others may also participate!

First up:

MISSing Ingredients: A Re-member-ing Cookbook

MISS is creating a hard cover re-member-ing cookbook, and we need your
recipes and memories to be a part of this publication. The first 200
recipes and memories entered will be published.

Deadline for all submissions Monday, October 5, 2009,
unless the 200 maximum is reached prior to that date.

There is NO FEE to submit your recipe and memory!!

Recipe Submission Instructions:

1. Visit http://www.fundcraft.com
2. Enter WEB ID: 13500-09VA
(a password is not required)
3. Click on "Short/cut Online"
4. Select (2) in drop down for # of parts in multi-part recipe
5. Select menu category from drop down
6. Enter Recipe Title
7. Enter Ingredients
8. Enter Recipe directions in Method section
9. Title your Memory in the Part 2 Subheading
10. Skip Ingredients section of Part 2
11. Enter your dedication in the second Method section

Frustrated, confused, it just doesn't make sense???? Email your recipe and
memory to: kathy.sandler@missfoundation.org

The cookbook will be available for purchase and delivery in December, 2009, just in
time for holiday gift giving.

You can PRE-ORDER your copies now! Cookbooks will be mailed directly to you!
Visit the MISS Store at: http://missfoundation.org/miss_shop/index.html
Cost of cookbook: $15/copy + $5 s/h
(100% proceeds to benefit MISS Foundation)

For additional information and downloadable PDF flyer here:
http://missfoundation.org/events/Events_2009CookbookFlyerWithInstructions.pdf

Second up:

heARTwork for the Holidays- Home Art Fundraiser

MISS, in partnership with http://www.KidsKreations.us, is hosting a
heARTwork Home Art Fundraising campaign. Your heART creations are
transferred onto items like notebooks, coffee mugs, aprons, ornaments,
pillows, tote bags, laptop stickers and more. MISS receives 35% of
proceeds.

You create art on an 8 1/2 x 11 sheet of paper, send heART and product order
form and check made out ot the MISS Foundation to either your support group
facilitator or to Kids Kreations by Friday, October 26, 2009. Your art will
beautifully transformed into a forever keepsake.

- Just is time for the holidays-

We invite both children and adults to explore one of the following themes:
Love
heART
Hope
What does your life look like now?
(new normal since the death of your child)
When I think of you...

Or... make a keepsake from your beloved child's footprint or handprint
(must be scanned and saved on disc as a graphic file like a jpg)

You can make artwork on your own or host a heArtwork night for your entire
MISS chapter.

All art and order forms must be submitted by Friday, October 23, 2009.

AND we are offering a challenge to each of our MISS chapters: The chapter
that sells the most heARTwork items will win credit towards scholarships to
the 2010 MISS Foundation Conference.

Have questions?? Call or email Kathy at 480-861-7511 or
Kathy.sandler@missfoundation.org

For additional information please download full information flyer here:
http://missfoundation.org/events/Events_2009MISSArtFundraiserFlyer.pdf

My new home office

Image by [ r ♥ c e y t ♥ y ] {I br♥ke for bokeh} via Flickr

We've been home a couple of weeks now.

The internet is finally working properly, although our electricity is not. I hope the technician will finally have the time to come here and fix it.

I devoted myself to get the kids' new school material ready and to prepare my lessons. Last week, I finally decided it was time to move my stuff out of my husband's now desk to my new home office.

I now have a place of my own. Well, sort of. My new home office is at the beginning of our new family room/homework space/ mom's place. I moved my books before the summer holidays and finally got a beautiful 1950's desk. I love it!

It has lots of little drawers and some big ones too. It has room for me to keep safe all my little trinkets and my papers. On top of it, I placed a small bookshelf that now contains some of my most priced books: books about bereavement and law books. On top, I placed my binders, which contains my past lessons, the notes I took while studying my Masters Degree and my MISS presentations. I even got a little space in which I have some VCR tapes about bereavement.

During the mornings, I have gorgeous sun light that enters through our glass doors and even on the evenings, when the kids are here, I get some peace to work on my computer and log on to the MISS Foundation Online Support Groups.

I want to thank my dear dh for all the hard work he put into our home remodeling. And for giving me the beautiful desk I wanted so much.

I want to thank my parents for pestering me all those years to make me value the company of a good book and for making me learn a second language.

I want to thank God for giving me the gift of brain power.

My Sister's Keeper

Image by lux2night via Flickr

Today in the morning, I finished reading My Sister´s Keeper by Jodi Picoult.

I bought this book yesterday, hoping to have an interesting story line while the kids swim all day long. I never thought I would be taking a wonderful plunge into a magnetic story.

Honestly, it took me awhile to understand her writing style. I had trouble understanding that the story was being told from the characters' point of view. Once I got hold of it, I was caught.

The ending is great and sooooo unexpected.

As you can imagine, I slept very little. I just couldn't put the book down.

Thanks Ms. Picoult for an intriguing, well written novel!

Now, I have to go to the bookstore and buy a new one.